my last semester

and i'm back at VT for my last semester. i felt out of whack for a few days before school started. i suppose it was the break in my routine of school. winter break was nice to chill at home, but I missed being at school. i'm used to school. i'm used to waking up every morning to go lift weights with 3 awesome Godly men. routine. it has been routine for me to be surrounded by such an awesome community. God has brought me through quite a bit since sophomore year.

i feel like this is going to be one of those "reflective" semesters. Jason told me the other day that I should not be surprised at seeing miracles. God's provision for me last summer was a miracle. I had no place to live. God provided. i didn't know which church to go to. God provided. i was beginning to wonder about whether or not I would ever meet someone. God provided. i do not know what the future holds, but i do know that God does. my future is in the hands of God. and He has a good future for me. He wants me to be happy. He wants me to feel joy. He does no rejoice in my sadness. He does not rejoice in my emptiness. He does not rejoice in my guilt.

I too often forget God's grace. i completely disregard it at times. Jesus' blood has washed away my sins. my sins yesterday, my sins today, my sins tomorrow. washed away. for me to feel guilt is to walk away from the cross. for me to obsess over the past is to walk away from the cross. i must not walk away from the cross. i must not walk away from the gift of salvation. i must embrace God's grace. i must embrace the cross.

k i'm butt-tired. i am pretty pumped about sleeping in tomorrow. big fan :)